On one hand, we know that the diversity of personality types, experiences, approaches, and characters enriches us and makes our teams more effective. On the other hand, this diversity can be our greatest challenge or a source of conflict and stress.

From my experience in the training room and in interventions during team misunderstandings, I have concluded that we need to create opportunities to talk about our differences, shed light on them, and remind ourselves of how valuable they are and the opportunities and challenges they bring.

In our consultancy, coaching, and training practice, I see that many problems would not even arise if teams remembered that, besides meetings on business and operational topics, it’s worth having occasional short meetings dedicated to working on relationships and what’s “between us.” Of course, it’s good to have an idea and structure to guide us.

One straightforward formula that, as I have had the opportunity to experience or observe with clients, can do a lot of good is the formula: resource/difficulty/need.

Resources – What do I bring to the team? What are my qualities that bring benefit, value, etc.? What do I perceive as my resource, talent, etc.? What do I do that may sometimes even be invisible to others but, in my opinion, brings value?

Difficulties – What do I know can be challenging working with me? What “piece” am I working on? What is challenging for me in communication, collaboration, or work? What am I struggling with? It’s good for you to know about it in terms of our collaboration. I know that sometimes I have trouble with…  Sometimes, it might be difficult or incomprehensible for others when I…

Needs – What do I need from others to collaborate well and communicate effectively? What values and principles are particularly important to me in teamwork? What small things make a difference for me and improve our joint functioning?

I encourage you to have a meeting dedicated solely to this exercise with your team. It’s worth giving people time to prepare for it. Just last week, a business client thanked me for sharing this formula with her because tension was building up in her team, and dangerous divisions were forming. As she herself claims, “It was surprising to me that such a simple exercise could help us so much in appreciating and understanding each other better.”